Most divorces have some amount of contention to them. There is so much at stake that the situation can be tense, especially if the divorce came about due to personal issues between the couple rather than them just realizing they no longer love each other but still get on fine.
The following can help keep things calmer and less stressful.
1. Realizing you’ll need to make compromises
Your spouse has certain rights in a divorce, just as you do. Your spouse will have certain goals in mind just as you do. It’s unlikely you can both get exactly what you want, so you’ll need to realize that a bit of give and take is a must. Being willing to compromise and cooperate can keep the whole process on more level ground. The exception might be if your spouse is manipulative and you know they can persuade you to compromise too much.
2. Looking for ways to avoid litigation
More and more people are choosing not to litigate their divorces. The big courtroom drama may be necessary in some situations, but often, there is a simpler, more amenable way to solve things.
3. Getting appropriate help to understand the law
Misunderstanding the law or not having a clear idea of how divorce works can be problematic. It can lead people to set goals that a court is highly unlikely to grant. It can also lead to unnecessary fear about things that are not likely to happen – such as losing everything to their spouse or not ever getting to see the kids again.
Beware of the advice that friends, family and colleagues may freely give – as while it might be well meant, it might be inaccurate. Instead, seek guidance from someone whose job it is to understand divorce laws and help people navigate the process.